Fantasy Ard Boyz 6 Weeks Away

Let me list out the reasons why me going to 'Ard Boyz for Fantasy in 6 weeks is just a ridiculous idea.
-I have at most played a dozen games of 8th edition, combined with a handful of 7th edition games before the change over.
-I have only played against two generals with their 3 armies who are also noobs like me. 
-That means I've got a basic grasp of 5 of the 15 armies out there, the other 10 are a large mystery.
-I've basically built each army to 2500, so I'm probably lacking models to actually field 3000.
-I wouldn't even know what's competitive at 3k as I'm still grasping every other point level.
-I've never played in a Fantasy tournament before let alone something like 'Ard boyz.
-I'll be traveling that whole week, and I'm sure my wife will be thrilled if I turn around to be gone all day Saturday.

At yet in spite of all that, or perhaps in someways because of it, all I can think about is what I could possibly pull together to make this happen.  Oh sure, grandiose dreams of actually winning a few games sounds nice, but I'm sure I'll get stomped to the curb and beaten badly with whatever I would try to do.  But if I'm missing the 40k tournaments for April that would be available and I want to press for my '1 weekend day a month' I could burn it for this and at least get some experience.

So if money and models weren't an issue what could I do with 500 points for Lizardmen?
+14 points for two more Skink Skirmishers to bring my core over 750 points.
+290 points to put my priest on an Engine of the Gods
+40 points to upgrade the Stegadon I had to an Ancient
+155 points to add two more salamanders and one extra handler

I think this would actually be ok.  I now have two Stegs to draw fire and the EotG can put up the gunjan sheild until he/the priest gets popped.  The extra salamanders would add some much needed killing power at medium range.

Of course I'm not dying to spend $90 on some units I will only probably use once a year.  I'm not saying I wont, just saying it isn't my first choice.  :)

So what do I have that I can use or borrow?
I've got 8 Cold One Calv, one of which could be a hero/lord.
I've got another Sauri Hero/Lord.
I could borrow some of Anthony's old Sauri models to fill in my Sauri blocks.
I've got a really old Slann that I dug out of my stuff from the 80s.  He looks horrible.

What a horribly old horrible model.

Adding a 2nd Slann sure sounds interesting but I've only got 280 points if I leave my other Lord alone.  That's enough for him with is free discipline, but I've been hearing some good things about taking a 2nd slann with death and the bonus dice discipline.  The hope is you get a few bonus dice from making kills with death to make both slann still be effective in the magic phase.  I'm not sure if it really works and I'd probably have to leave one of the slann floating out on his home and hope for LOS to keep him from taking cannon balls to the face.

The Cold One Calv is certainly also a big point sink and hopefully with more experience I could use them more effectively.  Maybe if I put a lord on there with the crown of command I could have a squad that could actually stick it out in combat instead of routed the first turn they make combat.

So I have some 'spend money' options and some 'use what you have' options.

Beastmen are far harder to figure out I think.

It would be easy to say 'use rares' but the rares are just bad from everything I can tell.

I don't have a lot of extra models.

I could add Slugtonuge for 190.
I could move my ungor block up by ten for 50 points.
Harpies are another problem as I don't have models.  Maybe I could borrow someones tyranid gargoyles and run them as two squads of 6.  That would add 98 points.
My heroes and lords are near maxed.
My Core is still 70 points shy of 750.
I've got 160 points left.

For simplicity I could maybe borrow some orc charriots.  2 of those knock out my core and last points.
Another option would be 20 more gors with extra hand weapons to ourflank.  I just don't think I have that many extra gors from my old mini pile.

So problems all around, not to mention just how silly the thought of going would be in the first place.  This of course doesn't mean it wont happen but even if it did come together I know it would just be a go get beat up and try to have fun!